Inazuma Meme Chronicles
by pikaree1
Summary: Exactly as the title says. It will hopefully make you laugh.


(A/N: I know this is a terrible idea. I know I have a ton of these on my profile. I know someone has done this already. BUT IT'S JUST TOO FUN.)

 **Pick 10 characters.**

1\. Alpha

2\. Amemiya Taiyou

3\. Afuro Terumi

4\. Beta

5\. Gandales Baran

6\. Ryugel Baran

7\. Clark Wonderbot-sama

8\. Endou Mamoru

9\. Fei Rune

10\. Fideo Aldena

 **You found 1's secret stash of chocolate.**

(Alpha)

"...Alpha has a secret batch of chocolate?!" I gasp, staring at it like it's gold.

Alpha walks into the room, emotionless as always.

But then he sees the chocolate in my hands.

Well, let's just leave it at that, and whoever told me to go into the room is paying my hospital bills, and I owe Fei some thank-you candies for saving me from certain death.

 **2 confesses his love to you.**

(Taiyou)

I blink. Processing... Processing... Processing... Then my face lights up like Rudolph's nose. No one's told me _that_ before. "Thanks, but... uh... I'm just not looking for a boyfriend right now, and you're not even real to begin with-"

Then he chuckles a little. "Gotcha!" he says, grinning mischievously.

I twitch and reach for my giant mallet that I would not be able to lift, let alone wield properly, in real life.

"AMEMIYA TAIYOU, GET BACK HERE!"

"Sorry, no!"

"IT'S EITHER THIS OR I THROW YOU TO THE FANGIRLS!"

"You'll have to catch me first!"

 **You walk into 3 in the street at midnight.**

(Aphrodi)

"Ow." I rub my aching back. "Sorry. It's so dark I can't see well..."

"It's alright," says the one I bumped into. "You were just naturally drawn to my godly presence like a beacon in the darkness."

I give Aphrodi my 'what the heck is this guy spouting' face. "Um, yeah. Sure. Goodbye..." I edge away, then break into a full-blown run.

 **You win a free holiday with 4.**

(Beta)

"Why am I on holiday with you?!" I demand. "Not that I have anything against you or anything," I add hastily, hoping to avoid her blowing up at me. "It's just... well... time and all that..."

Beta shrugs. "I don't know. Let's just enjoy this vacation, shall we?" She smiles serenely at me.

And looking at that serene smile, I just know she's going to put a crab in my hair when we get to the beach.

 **5 saves your life.**

(Gandales)

"I saved you. Does this mean I get candy?" Gandales asks excitedly, just like a little kid.

I deadpan at him. "Gandales. Dragging me out of a room with a mosquito in it does not count as saving my life."

 **6 is living in your house.**

(Ryugel)

I stare uncomprehendingly at the invader. "...What are you doing in my house?"

"Living in it, obviously," he says arrogantly.

With much difficulty I push and pull him until he's back outside. "Fix the hole in my wall. NOW."

 **You find 7's mobile phone (cell phone).**

(Wondeba)

I look at the phone. I look left. I look right. No talking blue teddy bear in sight. I ponder for a moment. Then I come to the conclusion that Wondeba probably has trackers on the phone and will come get it eventually. I walk off with the device in my pocket, ready to find out the social workings of a sentient teddy bear.

 **You're asleep and 8 comes in and wakes you up.**

Something shakes me. I figure it's my brothers, and since it's a weekend, I just pull my blanket over my head with a mumbled "Two more hours..."

"There's no time for that!" a familiar voice insists. Unfortunately, my sleep-muddled mind can't properly identify it- all I can tell is that it's not my brothers. I look up and find myself staring at a face that is far too cheerful and alert for what my clock says is two in the morning.

"SAKKA YAROU ZE!" he yells. How the shout doesn't wake up the rest of my family remains a mystery to me.

I stare. I sigh. I go back to sleep.

 **9 kidnaps you.**

(Fei)

"Where are you taking me?!" I demand, squirming in the ropes that are tying me up.

"No clue," Fei admits, turning the steering wheel and just barely avoiding crashing the van into a tree. "I was just told to kidnap you."

We're both silent for a moment before he says, "Hey, are you any good at driving?"

 **You go to the cinema. 10 is sitting in your seat.**

"Um... That's my seat," I say, glancing pointedly at Fidio.

"Ah! I'm sorry, miss!" he apologizes, standing up and moving to the next isle.

A short while later, the movie starts.

"WHY AM I NOT IN THIS?!"

 **1 confesses his love for 7. You are hiding in a bush with 4.**

(Alpha, Wondeba, Beta)

"I love you," Alpha says robotically.

Wondeba somehow processes that as "You are the best coach in the world" and declares, "Okay! I will train you!"

I turn to Beta. "How the heck does this even work...?"

She shrugs and giggles. "But this will make wonderful blackmail, don't you agree?"

I can't argue with her.

 **2 and 9 are arguing.**

(Taiyou, Fei)

"I'm Tenma's best friend!" Taiyou insists.

"No, I am!" Fei argues.

Tsurugi walks by them, talking to Tenma over the phone.

Taiyou and Fei are silent for a while. Then they sigh mournfully.

 **6 is making fun of 3.**

(Ryugel, Aphrodi)

"You look like a girl."

"FEEL THE WRATH OF THE GODS, MORTAL!"

 **5 and 10 are stuck in a burning building but you can only save one.**

(Gandales, Fideo)

Fideo, of course! Gandales will get out on his own... somehow.

 **2 is invisible.**

(Taiyou)

I stomp through the street, looking around angrily. He will not get away. "ARGH! TAIYOU, SHOW YOURSELF!" I scream in frustration, fruitlessly waving my mallet around.

I never should have given him that chameleon suit.

 **OMG! 9 is more awesome than 1!**

(Fei, Alpha)

"What are you looking at, Saru?" Fei asks.

Saru looks up at his friend. "The popularity polls in Sakka Weekly. Here, look." He hands the magazine to the rabbit boy.

 _1st place: Fei Rune_

 _2nd place: Alpha_

 **1, 6 and 4 are at your house for dinner. There's a black out.**

(Alpha, Ryugel, Beta)

"What happened?!" comes Ryugel's panicked voice.

I laugh sheepishly. "I was trying to turn on the stove, but something went wrong...

"HOW CAN YOU DO THAT WHILE TRYING TO TURN ON A STOVE!"

"I DON'T KNOW, OKAY!"

"Oh, calm down," Beta says calmly. "I'll get us some light. Alpha, where are you?"

"Over here."

There's a click, and suddenly the room is illuminated. Alpha has light shining from his eyes.

Seeing Ryugel and my creeped out stares, Beta explains, "Alpha is the prototype for Ray Rukh."

 **3 and 7 pull a prank on you.**

(Aphrodi, Wondeba)

"Petal! I found Taiyou-kun!" Wondeba calls.

I screech to a halt, nearly hitting an innocent bystander in the process. "You did?! Where?!" I demand. He points the way, and I zoom over, soon catching sight of a familiar sunny orange hairstyle. "AMEMIYA TAIYOU, I'VE GO YOU N-"

The boy turns around, revealing red eyes rather than blue. It is a trick. "APRIL FOOLS!" Aphrodi and Wondeba laugh uproariously, high-fiving each other for a prank well executed.

I am anime-blazing with anger. "TAIYOU ISN'T THE ONLY ONE I NEED TO HIT..."

 **You walk in on 4 and 10 kissing.**

(Beta, Fideo)

I blink. I blink again. I remember to shut my jaw before I catch flies. Then I turn around, walk away, and erase it from my mind.

Beta and Fideo shrug before going back to smooching.

 **4 and 9 steal your boat.**

(Beta, Fei)

I gape at Fei, who has just kissed Tenma, and Beta, who has just kissed Tsurugi. Speaking of the two Raimon players, both are confused and completely red. Tenma looks like he's about to cry while Tsurugi looks ready to kill the first person to speak. Or Beta.

I do the only natural thing. I throw a temper tantrum. "How could you sink my ships?! TenAo and KyouLala are life, TenAo and KyouLala are love!" I howl, flinging weapons of mass destruction such as armchairs and woks at them (with the help of some magic fairy dust).

"I'm sorry!" Fei shouts, dodging an armchair and pulling Tenma out of the way of a stray wastepaper basket. "You don't have a boat, so Beta suggested we sink your ships!"

"IT DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY!" I shriek, throwing another potted plant at the rabbit boy.

 **While 5 and 7 rob your house.**

(Gandales, Wondeba)

After returning from another failed day of Taiyou-searching (the boy seriously knows how to run and hide), the only thing to make things better is a snack, right? Right! So I open up the cabinet and reach into a box for a Choco-Pie, but I instead pull out a note.

 _Sorry, we ate them all. We were hungry!_

 _-Wondeba and Gandales_

I scream in rage.

 **You're on a cruise with 3 and 4.**

(Aphrodi, Beta)

I watch in amusement as Aphrodi gets hit on by guy after guy. "So, how long do you think it'll be before he goes ballistic and makes the 'insolent mortals face the wrath of a god'?" I ask Beta conversationally.

She takes a sip of her fruit smoothie and shrugs. "Watch his face. When it turns purple, I think he's close," she giggles.

 **You need a new organ. 1 and 6 are both compatible.**

(Alpha, Ryugel)

"Can I have a different donor?" I beg. "I don't want robot organs. Or alien ones."

Doctor Gouenji blinks. "Robots? Aliens?"

His son, the one who had found the donors, inches towards the door...

 **5 is robbing 2.**

(Gandales, Taiyou) He's robbing him of screen time.

 **You're being held hostage by 10. The hero is 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, or 9. Or multiple.**

(Fideo, the rest)

"Help, help, I'm a hostage!" I shriek. Fideo covers his face more with the wide-brimmed black hat.

Since Taiyou would never let an innocent girl be kidnapped, he zooms in to save me.

And falls right into my pit trap.

"IT WORKED!" I laugh maniacally as Fideo unties me. "IT REALLY WORKED!"

 **3** **and 5 have robbed a bank. 5 comes to you for help.**

(Aphrodi, Gandales)

"And why should I help you?" I demand, snapping the camera again. "Alright, Taiyou. Wink. Akane, get the side shot."

The tuxedo-ed boy reluctantly complies, plastering a charming smile on his face. Akane snaps her camera.

"Good!" I turn back to Gandales. "I'm sorry, but we're in the middle of a photo shoot here. Bye bye." I point at the door.

Then it opens and Aphrodi walks in. "If you distract the cops for half an hour, then make a banner and I'll fly it around to advertise the auction for the photos," he declares, already guessing my intention.

We shake hands. "It's a deal."

 **6 is in a bad mood with 3 for robbing a bank. 6 comes to you.**

(Ryugel, Aphrodi)

"He dragged Gandales into it!" Ryugel says, upset. "How could he do that?!"

I sigh irritably. "The fact that you're looking out for your brother is great and all, but can we talk about this later?" I gesture to the crowd of Taiyou fangirls. "I'm trying to run an auction here."

 **1 and 7 are doing a monkey dance. You and 10 are watching and filming it.**

(Alpha, Wondeba, Fideo)

I laugh maniacally. Fideo sighs. Alpha and Wondeba continue dancing.

 **3, 5 and 9 are at an (anime) convention.**

(Aphrodi, Gandales, Fei)

Fei, having dyed his hair blue and cosplaying as Shiota Nagisa, greets a Koro-sensei cosplayer. Gandales and Ryugel have shown up as Amaimon and Mephisto from Blue Exorcist.

Aphrodi, decked out in a white and orange sailor suit, is the best Sailor Venus cosplayer at the convention.

 **You, 1, 4, 6 and 10 are having a sleepover at 7's house.**

(Alpha, Beta, Ryugel, Fideo, Wondeba)

Fideo gets a headache from all the space and time travel and leaves early. Halfway through the night, I get up to get water and trip over Alpha. Hoping I haven't woken him, I get up and glance down, only to discover he's sucking his thumb and has Wondeba in a death grip. I quietly wake up Beta and point it out to her. Trying to tone down our giggles, we take a photo for the memories.

In the meantime, a very tired Ryugel is speaking with Gandales on the phone, assuring the younger that he's perfectly okay.

 **2 is in love with 5 who is in love with 8 but 8 is in love with 2. 2 doesn't love 8 back, 5 doesn't love 2 back and 8 doesn't love 5 back.**

(Taiyou is in love with Gandales who is in love with Endou but Endou is in love with Taiyou. Taiyou doesn't love Endou back, Gandales doesn't love Taiyou back and Endou doesn't love Gandales back.)

Taiyou does not have much longer to live. He knows that. Tears course down his face as he turns to the boy he loves. Smiling through his tears, he says, "I love you, Gandales... Farewell!" Then he vaults over the side of the cliff.

"Oh no! Taiyou!" Endou exclaims, leaping after him. "Don't throw your life away!"

I wait while Taiyou army crawls across the floor, out of the camera's view. Endou follows. It's been too long. "GANDALES!" I bark. He is nowhere to be found. Grumbling, I cross his name off the cast list and leave in search of a replacement.

The director is _not_ gonna be happy with me.

(A/N: Welp... Hope this made you laugh. Please review.)


End file.
